


Take It All

by Kimium



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Apologies to Hanamura and Twogami I can't seem to keep the two of you alive usually, F/F, F/M, I sort of hit points in the game, Komaeda is still a problematic marshmallow, M/M, Slight liberties taken with some scenes, Soulmate AUS are filed under tropes that I always fall for, Spoilers for SDR 2, sort of a soulmate au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 17:03:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8218190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kimium/pseuds/Kimium
Summary: Slight Soulmate AU. Spoilers for SDR 2Soulmates are found when two people touch and their names appear on their skin. When one dies the other feels the pain.Ever since Nagito was born everyone who touches him gives him their names, but never gets his in return. Nagito has accepted this as part of his bad luck cycle and tries to hide it, but secrets can't be kept forever.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This summer I bought Noragami and one of the images from the series I enjoy the most are the names on Nora's arms. I also fall for Soulmate AUs 2000% of the time, so I combined these two thoughts together. (Soulmate AUs on my list for tropes I will forever fall for.) This fic turned out to be a beast and I wrote way more than I expected. I'm not sure if everything is in a good order, but I tried another one and it didn't feel right. 
> 
> I took a few liberties with some of the scenes (mainly who is there or not and what people say). I did replay a bit of Chapter Three just to make sure some scenes lined up chronologically. Probably why this story took so long to complete.
> 
> As always feel free to leave a comment or kudos. It's not needed, but they do make my day. Also, I'd like to take this moment to thank everyone who reads my silly stories and to the people who leave me kudos and comments. As cheesy as it sounds they really do inspire me to continue writing.

Nagito had been so careful to not touch other people that when Hanamura brushed past his hand on the way to the trial Nagito felt all the air in his lungs leak out in a wheeze. His heart spluttered and Nagito felt the familiar burn on his arm. It lasted for less than a second, but Nagito knew it was there. A burning cold seeped into his bones, turning them brittle. Nagito shivered and knew his bad luck cycle was in motion. How else could he explain this? Today was not his day, though Nagito should have known that the small nugget of luck he had experienced earlier was only the prelude to an small moment of bad luck.

Byakuya had shoved him, dying. After his head stopped hurting from the impact, Nagito came to the realization that there was no burning sensation at their touch. The experience had left him with all sorts of questions that would never get answered. He even stepped away from the group before the investigation to check. No new mark; Nagito would know. He took such great pains to memorize where they all were. Sometimes when he had problems falling asleep, when his brain felt too wired and jumpy, Nagito would trace his hands down his arms and legs, pressing fingers into the kanji, memorizing all the names.

The world was never kind to Nagito from the moment he was born. Nagito closed his eyes. He supposed this was merely a by product of his luck cycle, an extra added in a package Nagito never wanted. The one gift humans had, the ability to find their soulmates by touch, was merely an additional setting to his bad luck.

Nagito opened his eyes and pressed his jacket’s fabric by his wrist. There were a variety of marks all over his arms and down his legs, some he didn’t remember getting, but most he did. Tracing his hand upwards Nagito rested his fingers on the crook of his elbow. The marks had long since passed, but if he looked carefully, under the right lighting, he could see his parent’s names. He didn’t remember getting them, but he did remember losing them. Nagito dropped his hand. Now was not the time to look, even though Nagito was curious to see where Hanamura’s mark had appeared. He supposed it would have to wait, though if the trial went well for everyone else Hanamura would be gone and Nagito would be left with just an imprint. He laughed lightly to himself. Even the imprint would have to wait. Nagito wasn’t sure if he would be conscious after the trial.

“Are you ready Komaeda?”

His thoughts dispersed. Nagito looked over to see Hinata fiddling with his tie, “As ready as I’ll ever be.” Nagito replied.

Hinata looked down, “Right…”

The elevator began to descend. The atmosphere was heavy, thick and copious with a swirl of negative emotions. Nagito felt the weight on his chest, compromising his breathing. It threatened to consume them, but Nagito knew it wouldn’t happen. Despair, after all, was merely a footnote for Hope.

Even though the situation was dire, Nagito couldn’t help but feel a bit impressed with the court room. Monokuma was already there, along with a tied up Monomi. As soon as everyone was settled the black and white bear gave a little speech before letting them launch into debate.

Nagito threw himself in, participating as much as he could, even testing his luck with the reveal of his involvement in the case. His bad luck was already on a roll, why should Nagito stop there? Of course, eventually his good luck returned for the briefest of moments with Hinata seeing through his lies and with everyone’s help, finally identified Hanamura as the killer.

“Congratulations! You’ve voted correctly!” Monokuma was practically twirling with delight, “Time to move onto the punishment.”

A small voice in the back of Nagito’s mind reminded him that Hanamura had touched him earlier. Nagito felt the wind knock out of him as Monokuma forced them to walk over to a large window to “watch the event” like it was a sports tournament. Nagito pressed himself into a corner and hoped no one would notice, that they’d be too focused on the horror.

He did his best to watch, wondering when the actual dying would occur. His heart pulsed and ached, and Nagito took a deep breath. As soon as the helicopter came to pick Hanamura up, Nagito knew what the bear had in mind. He turned his head to not look, like that would have any influence on the pain. For a brief moment there was nothing, just his pounding heart and the anticipation and fear from the group smothering the air.

And then the pain started. His legs burned, burned all the way through, down through the skin, the muscle, and the bone. Suddenly everything was burning, consuming him and he wanted to scream. Desperately Nagito pressed his hands to his mouth, tears leaking down his face as his legs gave out. No, he had to stand…Nagito didn’t feel the floor until it was under him. Everything was burning in a heat no one could comprehend. How was Hanamura still conscious after all of this?

The pain finally hit his head and Nagito felt his throat rip itself raw as he screamed into his hand. It burned it burned it burned… it was so hot, too hot. He was being boiled alive, like a lobster. Nagito curled into a ball, but the heat was everywhere at once, excruciating pain danced up and down his spine and Nagito felt his hands drop from his mouth as he fell to unconsciousness.

~

When Nagito finally woke everything felt worn and used. His mind was fuzzy and his mouth cotton-like. An itch developed in his throat and Nagito coughed. The cough wasn’t deep enough to satisfy the itch. Nagito took a deep breath, maybe if he forced himself to cough…

“H-he’s a-awake.” A stammering voice announced.

Nagito felt something cold press against his forehead. It felt nice, too nice. Wearily Nagito forced his eyes open. The light hit his eyes uncomfortably and Nagito adjusted, feeling blankets shift around him.

Tsumiki loomed to the side with a glass of ice water in her hands. The cup was touching his forehead. Behind her was the rest of the class, all sporting various looks. Majority of the looks were relieved, but it was not directed at him. It was like they knew it was now acceptable to leave and not look bad.

“A-are you o-okay?” Tsumiki continued to splutter.

Nagito tried to sit up, but the world spun. He fell back down. At once Tsumiki was closer, eyes professionally scanning his body.

“What happened?” Nagito slurred out.

“That’s what we want to know.” Koizumi firmly stated.

“We found you, unconscious.” Sonia supplied, eyes knitted with worry, “Nidai-san graciously carried you back to your cottage.”

Great he had another mark plus he was in his cottage with everyone crammed inside?

“H-how long?” Nagito asked, head spinning with the effort.

“U-um maybe about t-thirty minutes…” Tsumiki replied, “Y-you have a mild fever.”

Oh. That was new. Not that Nagito had ever expected to experience the phantom sensation of being burned alive. He hoped to never experience that again. Groaning Nagito forced himself in a semi- upright position. At once Tsumiki pressed the glass closer to him. She had thoughtfully put a straw in. It was for the best. Nagito accepted the water, drinking the entire thing.

“Thank you Tsumiki.” Nagito’s throat didn’t feel as scratchy, “I’m flattered you’re all concerned over a lowly person like me, but there is really no need to remain here.”

At once Kuzuryuu turned towards the door. Souda, Gundham, and Saionji looked like they were about to bolt too. Nagito hoped they did. Perhaps if he manipulated the conversation they’d leave and not bother asking him to explain.

Lying down Nagito closed his eyes and let out a deep breath, “Really I’m honoured, but I am sure you have better things to do than stick around a bug like me.”

His words seemed to do the trick, which was good because Nagito was slowly feeling fatigue slip over him. Kuzuryuu immediately walked out and his actions broke the ice. Souda all but fled while Gundham glided out of the room silently. Saionji started to leave and immediately tugged Koizumi’s arm, dragging the photographer.

“Are you sure it’s all right to leave you?” Sonia’s brow was furrowed, but she looked like she wanted to leave.

Thankfully Pekoyama cut in, “I think Komaeda wishes to rest, as most of us do.” Her gaze was level and voice even.

The Sword woman’s words did the trick. Nidai, Owari, and Mioda walked out, followed by Pekoyama who at least gave Nagito a small nod before exiting. Nanami soon followed, sleepily waltzing out as she pulled her portable game out from her pocket. This left Tsumiki and Hinata hovering the room. Nagito had expected Tsumiki to stay, but not Hinata.

“I-If it’s all right w-with you.” Tsumiki stammered, “I-I’ll keep an eye o-on you for a b-bit. You got a f-fever and I w-want to make s-sure you are o-okay.”

Nagito eyed the nurse. No doubt her version of “keeping an eye” on him was simply changing a cold cloth on his forehead every so often. The chance of her touching him was high, but Nagito would take one more mark in return for not answering people’s questions. He gave a small hum of agreement.

“H-Hinata-san.” Tsumiki turned, “P-please leave this to me.”

The boy frowned and rubbed his head, “Are you sure?”

“Y-Yes.” The nurse nodded, “I-it’s only one p-person. I’ll m-manage.”

Hinata gave one more long look before agreeing, “Ok. I’ll leave this to you.”

Nagito waited until he was sure Hinata was gone before closing his eyes. In the background he could hear Tsumiki moving around. Nagito let out a long puff of air and drifted to sleep.

~

The next day, as Nagito was walking around the second island, Hinata walked up to him, easily slipping by his side. It almost made Nagito stop in mid stride. He hadn’t expected Hinata to want to talk to him after the Trial. In fact, Nagito was pretty sure Nidai and Souda wanted to do something, but were clearly talked out of it. It didn’t stop the two from glowering at him all throughout breakfast though.

“Hello Hinata-kun.” Nagito greeted.

“Are you free?” Hinata asked, “Want to come with me to the diner?”

Nagito blinked a flutter forming in his stomach, “You want to… hang out with me?”

Hinata shifted and looked down, “If I didn’t I wouldn’t have asked you.”

The other was hiding something. Nagito stopped walking and crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t want you to force yourself to hang around trash like me, but could you at least be honest if you don’t want to?”

“It isn’t that!” Hinata looked up, frowning, “I can choose who I want to hang out with. Don’t put yourself down like that.”

“Then what is it?” Nagito raised an eyebrow.

“I…” Hinata suddenly looked a bit pink, “I was just wanted to ask you what happened yesterday.”

Nagito swallowed. Hinata really was just being polite; he had an ulterior motive. Of course he expected everyone was wondering, but that didn’t mean he wanted to answer. Even if it was Hinata asking. Nagito wasn’t sure if Hinata was asking for himself or asking for the group. Either way, the other wasn’t getting the truth. He was aware of how hypocritical that was, demanding Hinata be honest with him yet in the same breath lie, but Nagito didn’t care.

“I wasn’t feeling well from all the cleaning.” Nagito easily lied as he started to walk to the diner. Maybe if he started walking Hinata wouldn’t pay close attention to his face.

The other started to follow him. Nagito continued to lie, “The trial just left me fatigued. I guess it’s pathetic to be the only one to pass out, but it’s me we’re talking about so…”

Hinata loudly groaned, “Komaeda please don’t put yourself down.”

Nagito secretly smiled and let their conversation deviate. It was for the best after all. Besides, if he spoke he might accidently drive Hinata away, and Nagito didn’t want to give up the other’s company quite yet. Even if that company was just for the sake of getting answers.

~

“You… you want to hang out with me?”

Nagito stared. It was well after dinner and the air was finally cool. Night gave more opportunities to walk around without sweltering, which was why Nagito was walking around the first island. What he didn’t expect was Hinata to pop out of the Market and immediately walk over to him.

“It’s okay right?” Hinata shuffled, “I mean walks are better with company yes?”

Hinata was right… but that wasn’t the point, “I agree. I mean, why me? Surely you have better options than trash like me.”

The brown haired boy instantly frowned, “I thought I told you earlier that I’ll hang out with who ever I want.”

Nagito vaguely remembered the other saying that, but he thought Hinata was just saying it to be polite. This was different. There was no question to answer, so there should be no reason for Hinata to want to hang out with him right? Nagito frowned and suddenly wanted to be alone, away from Hinata. It would be for the better. If he went along it would only set himself up for heart break later.

“Sure Hinata-kun.” The words tumbled from his mouth before he could stop them.

“Great.” Hinata replied.

Why did he say that? Nagito stared at his hands in confusion, like his hands would have all the answers to his lapse in judgement. This was not good he had to correct himself before it was too late.

“Let’s go to Jabberwock Park.” Damn it… no, no…

“Okay.” Hinata smiled and Nagito felt like the world had stopped.

~

Saionji was bent over Koizumi’s corpse, crying loudly, her sniffles and sobs filling the beach house. Suddenly the place felt smaller as the traditional dancer cried. Everyone shifted and began to shuffle around, investigating.

Nagito paused and stared at Saionji. As she cried the girl reached for the photographer’s wrist, turning it up, staring. A jolt hit Nagito’s stomach as he realized the deeper reason to why Saionji was crying. Words formed on his lips and Nagito wanted to offer advice to the girl; he was an expert in dealing with that sort of loss, but the words died. Even if he could get her alone she would probably not listen in her grief. It was also practically giving away his secret.

“It must be hard.”

Nagito turned. Hinata was standing close, staring with sad eyes at the display of emotion, “I… Saionji’s name was on Koizumi.”

Hinata had already checked the corpse? “You saw the mark?”

“Yeah…” Hinata shifted, “It definitely outweighs the ‘evidence’ we have pointing to Saionji being the killer. I think… someone tried to frame her and didn’t realize they were soulmates.”

It was a good assumption. There were very few cases of soulmates killing one another, though not unheard. Nagito sucked in a deep breath, “I want to agree, but I do hope you have more than just soulmates as her alibi.”

Hinata turned and glared, “I wish I could get mad at your pessimistic view, but our lives are on the line. So yes, I do.”

Nagito let out a short laugh and turned away, “Just being realistic Hinata-kun.”

~

Nagito watched the execution and felt his heart tinge. How hopeful Pekoyama had been. It was a shame to watch her go, though she didn’t go down without a last bit of hope towards Kuzuryuu. As her body shielded the Yakuza heir Nagito wanted to cry. That hope! It extended up until her last moments. As the Swords woman died, Nagito was sure Kuzuryuu’s screaming was not just from watching his childhood friend die. It almost made Nagito wish Pekoyama had touched him just so he could feel it, but perhaps witnessing the beautiful display of hope was better. This way Kuzuryuu could treasure the pain himself and turn it towards hope.

Nagito smiled and felt tears stream down his face.

~

“What are you doing here?”

Hinata’s eyes widened at his words, but the other set his tray down on the table and sat down, arms crossed over his chest, “What does it look like? I’m eating breakfast.”

“There are other tables Hinata-kun.” Nagito replied.

“I’m aware of that Komaeda.” Hinata snarkily bit back, “I picked the table I wanted to be at.”

Nagito narrowed his eyes and frowned. Hinata didn’t move and instead said a quick thanks before beginning to eat. “Fine.” Nagito started to gather his things, “I’ll move.”

Suddenly a pair of chopsticks were right in front of his face as Hinata rudely pointed them at Nagito, “I don’t want you to move. In fact, I want to eat breakfast with you. Let’s keep this pleasant.”

“You’re the one pointing chopsticks in my face.” Nagito batted the wood away, “What makes you think I’ll listen?”

“Nothing.” Hinata answered, lowering his chopsticks, “I only have my words, asking you to stay.”

Really? The other thought that was enough to keep Nagito sitting with him? “I’m sure avoiding me is what everyone else is doing.”

“Well good thing I’m not everyone else.” Hinata retorted, rolling his eyes, “Quit this and just eat your damn breakfast with me.”

What was Hinata gaining from this? Nagito tilted his head. Like last time there was no question to be asked. Was Hinata really just offering his company with no strings attached? That couldn’t be it, but Nagito still felt his heart soar at the thought of someone willingly spending time with him.

His heart was a traitor and so was his mouth. “Fine. I’ll stay.” Nagito muttered, trying his best to pretend his mouth wasn’t twitching into a smile.

~

After the excitement and horror of Owari and Nidai’s turmoil, Nagito woke up with a fever. This one was worse than the one after Hanamura’s execution. The room was spinning and Nagito was so warm he could feel the heat radiating off of his body. Wobbling Nagito forced himself out of bed and out the door. By the time he got to the restaurant Nagito’s vision was spinning, but he could spot people. He meandered over. Owari was standing by a pillar crying. Saionji was standing by Koizumi’s memorial. Before Nagito could stop himself he started talking.

“Koizumi is fine Saionji.” What was Nagito even thinking? “I saw her by the theatre.”

The dancer burst into tears, mirroring Owari and her loud sobs. Nagito could only stare. What was coming out of his mouth? Lifting his hand, he placed it over his lips. Even the skin around his mouth felt too warm to the touch. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw Hinata walk up to the restaurant. After talking to Owari and Saionji, both who were more sobs than words, Hinata walked over to him. The concern on his face made Nagito stop in his tracks.

“Komaeda? You look flushed. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I’m fine.” Nagito blurted out before he could stop the words.

“You’re clearly not fine.” Hinata frowned, “You’re sweating and you look like you’re about the collapse.”

“No, I’m great.” Nagito continued to protest, the words spilling from his lips.

Hinata looked like he was about the argue, but Mioda showed up looking just as great as Nagito felt. Tsumiki came rushing in immediately after, explaining how the musician had a fever. Hinata then went to check. As he got towards him Nagito tried to step back. He might be sick, but he wasn’t going to let Hinata touch him. Getting sick and gaining another mark would be the pinnacle of his bad luck. He was saved when Monokuma showed up with an explanation.

Nagito barely paid any attention, though apparently he and the two girls were inflicted with the “Despair Disease”. The bear went on to explain what each of them had. Apparently Nagito had the “Liar’s Disease”, whatever that meant. He was sure that a disease like that didn’t really exist, but who was Nagito to complain? Sickness already wrecked his body, what was one more?

By this time the rest of the group showed up, all sporting various shades of concern and disbelief.

“We have to take them to the hospital!” Sonia exclaimed.

“Can they even walk?” That was Nanami.

“Well Mioda seems fine…” Souda muttered, “And Owari is just crying…”

“K-Komaeda-san looks like h-he is burning up.” Tsumiki observed, “I-I think someone should help him.”

That meant someone had to touch him. Nagito couldn’t let that happen. As if he was just going to resign himself to being carried.

“I can walk myself.” Nagito tried to firmly say. Thankfully no one tried to argue with him.

 It wasn’t his best idea; Nagito drifted in and out of consciousness, but as his mind was clearing up Nagito realized he was already at the hospital, sitting in one of the rooms. Tsumiki was fussing with something before turning around, some blue fabric folded neatly in her arms.

“I-I found a robe y-your size.” She offered the blue robe, “I-I’ll let you change… unless… you need h-help?” She gave a very firm professional look at the last bit.

Nagito’s fingers felt like lead and his mind was spinning. He definitely couldn’t do this on his own. “I’m fine. I got this.” The words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop the lie.

“O-okay…” Tsumiki stepped out, “I-I’ll be out in the h-hall.”

Great. Nagito looked down at the robe. Maybe this was a good thing. It would spare her seeing all the marks littered on his arms and down his legs. Still, it was a challenge. Nagito managed to get his jacket off, but lifting his arms to take his shirt off felt like too much. In the end he forced his arms limply through his shirt, managing to pull the fabric over his head. The shirt was tossed, inside out, on the floor. His pants were fortunately easier to take off.

Now the robe. It took Nagito a painfully long time to get his arms in, but once he did Nagito flopped down on the bed, relieved. Everything was a daze of blurred colours. Half-heartedly he wrapped the robe around himself and crawled under the covers. He had no clue when Tsumiki was coming back, but at least now she wouldn’t see the marks.

The door opened a few minutes later. Nagito opened his eyes. It was Tsumiki, carrying a bowl of water and some towels. Nagito lay obediently and let the girl do her job. He already had her mark burned somewhere on his skin; it was moot point to try and stop her now.

“J-just so you k-know.” Tsumiki started to talk, “H-Hinata and K-Kuzuryuu volunteered to w-watch over everyone h-here.”

Hinata? Nagito felt his heart flutter. The sudden image of Hinata visiting him out of concern filled his mind. Nagito felt his fluttering turn into soaring. Hinata would be perfect. Everyone else always acted skittish or uncomfortable; like Nagito’s sicknesses would consume them too. But Nagito was sure the brown haired boy wouldn’t act like that and it left him wishing the other would visit him. After all, the other had hung out with him because he wanted to… would sickness really stop Hinata? The answer felt obvious.

“I don’t want to see Hinata.” Nagito muttered, the sickness taking over.

Tsumiki didn’t answer him and Nagito was grateful. It allowed him to pretend he didn’t say such a blatant lie.

~

Nagito felt his face contort as he watched the girl break down, her eyes swirling with something dark. This was not the Tsumiki they had met. Whoever this girl was she was merely a shadow of the timid nurse.

“It doesn’t matter anyways.” She almost breathlessly said, hands clutched near her chest, “I’ll be going to my beloved. Back to the one who always forgave me…”

Monokuma took it as the hint to start the execution. The bear practically twirled the hammer as he slammed it on the button. The room shifted and before Nagito knew it Tsumiki was carted off and the monitors came to life. It was almost cruel to make them watch, but Nagito knew it was less cruel than turning away, though Nagito knew everyone wanted to.

He had forgotten that Tsumiki had touched him until he felt a shortness of breath. The pain slowly crept up. Nagito felt his lungs over working. He needed oxygen and he needed it now, but the atmosphere was thinning faster and faster. This was not fair; he had just gotten over being sick. Nagito fell to his knees, head spinning. He needed air he needed air he needed…

Nagito felt the floor under his body as he gasped. Why couldn’t he breathe? The mark had to be fading fast… it should be over soon. Black spots filled his vision and Nagito could only feel annoyance as his conscious slipped.

He woke up, still in the courtroom. Nagito took it as a sign that he hadn’t been out for a long time. Everyone was still there, hovering around him, varying expressions painting their faces. Sitting up Nagito rubbed his head.

“How long?”

“Only about ten minutes. You scared us.” That was Sonia.

That was better than Nagito expected, “I think I haven’t fully recovered.” Ironic, he was cured of the disease and he was lying of his own volition. He just hoped no one would try to pry.

Thankfully Monokuma popped up, looking almost mad that he was forgotten. The bear began to spew about a friend coming back and at once everyone’s attention shifted onto the possibility of Nidai returning. Nagito welcomed the distraction and forced himself to stand and exit the court room with the others.

~

In hindsight they should have seen the trap Monokuma had laid out for them, but it was too late now.

Nagito woke up the deluxe room. Sharp pains of hunger ran through his body. He could feel the acid burn his stomach and his body slowly eat away at the little fat he had. There was also an unexpected pain in his neck, chest, and arm. Immediately Nagito pulled his sleeves back and examined his arms. His eyes strained to read them and after a while Nagito gave up. Rolling over he wished he had a clock in his room. The only clocks were the ones out in the lobby, but even then Nagito wasn’t sure if the time displayed was correct. It would be something Monokuma would do; he was already messing around with their concept of time. Sighing Nagito sat up and felt a bit of dizziness as the blood rushed to his head. Standing up Nagito hobbled over to the door. Laying around waiting wouldn’t solve anything. Sure there wasn’t much he could do, but he wanted to check the time.

As soon as he opened the door a loud ringing hit his ears. It was a shrill metal sound. Wincing Nagito headed over to the source, the lobby. Inside was Kuzuryuu, Souda, and Gundham. All three were busy with the clock that Kuzuryuu was holding. The tacky pink monstrosity was practically jumping out of Kuzuryuu’s hands as the three tried to turn it off. Thankfully Souda located something and the sound ceased. Nagito’s ears were grateful, but he could still hear the ringing.

“Ugh glad that’s over.” Souda plopped down, rubbing his ears, “Who’s the idiot who set the alarm on this thing?”

“Does it matter?” Kuzuryuu softly groaned as he joined Souda. “Just make sure it won’t start up again.”

“Right.” Souda picked the clock up and turned it around, “Looks simple enough…”

“Good morning.”

Nagito decided to make his presence known. The three of them looked up, all sporting various looks and no response. Nagito waltzed in un-phrased and watched Souda tinker with the clock, hands consistently moving around, feeling all the knobs and screws. Fingers expertly twisted and untwisted some knobs, almost rhythmically. It was mesmerizing to watch. While Souda was a loud individual, there was also something quiet and thoughtful about him.

Suddenly the familiar chime of the PA system rang through the building. Everyone jolted up, Souda dropping the clock with a cry as it landed on his foot. Nagito’s eyes widened. There was no announcement for the morning and night… which meant…

“A body has been discovered!” Monokuma happily exclaimed over the system.

Another murder. Nagito ignored the rest of the announcement and felt a smile fill his face. Someone had died to become a stepping stone for hope. He wondered who it was. Either way he’d find out soon. It was time for an investigation.

~

The black book burned a hole in his mind and pocket. Nagito felt a full body shiver run strongly down his spine. Even though it was a quick glance the truth was consuming him, eating away at what little sanity Nagito could claim he had. It was ironic that the truth everyone was seeking to save them was ultimately destroying him.

Ultimate Despair. The phrase ate away at him slowly like a parasite. He didn’t want to believe it, but the contents were real, he was sure. It meant there was a traitor… to Ultimate Despair. Only one of them was actually good. Nagito knew it was definitely not him. The realization only added fuel to his destruction.

The “traitor” had to still be alive and there was no way they’d admit who they are. Nagito supposed that in the end, even if he was Ultimate Despair, he could at least try to create hope. Straightening his back Nagito glanced around the Octagon and located the fridge. Monokuma said there was weapons in this room. The fridge was not excluded. He walked over. There had to be something he could use. Opening the door Nagito’s eyes landed on the bottles inside. Slowly, he felt a plan form.

~

Sonia’s face was ashen as they watched Gundham’s execution. Nagito had expected it was because she didn’t want to see another person die. He was corrected when, as Gundham was stampeded over, Sonia fell to the ground with a single scream before slipping into unconsciousness. Nagito shuddered as everyone ran over to her side and wondered if anyone would connect it to the incidents he had earlier.

No one did.

~

When the day of his plan arrived Nagito did a quick mental check. The poison was already transferred, the spear at the warehouse along with the rope and those stupid Monokuma panels. The duct tape and knife sat comfortably in his jacket pocket. It was risky keeping those items on his person, but Nagito trusted his luck and exited his cottage for probably the last time.

A loud click hit his ears and Nagito froze, turning around. Hinata had exited out of his cabin at the same time. Nagito felt a blush hit his cheeks. Why didn’t he check to make sure no one was around? Of course it hardly mattered, he could enter the restaurant a little after Hinata, but it still felt like a wave of bad luck. The other simply looked at him, his mouth opening before he clamped it shut audibly. Nagito held his gaze, though he remembered the words he spewed during their last trial. Hinata’s little secret wasn’t really a secret considering the other had no clue, but Nagito couldn’t help but feel betrayed.

Hinata was ordinary, plain. There was nothing good about him, no talent, but it didn’t stop Nagito from wanting to see Hinata. The other had been nothing but strangely kind to him, but in the end his bad luck won. Talent was everything and of course the first person Nagito wanted to call friend was worthless, just like him.

Their gazes dropped and Nagito wished Hinata would leave. A long few seconds passed and by the time Nagito looked up Hinata had left. A wave of something hit Nagito and he wasn’t sure if it was relief.

~

They all believed him. Nagito couldn’t help but roll his eyes as he shut the door to the warehouse. For as bright at they all were, did everyone really expect Nagito to find that many explosives?

Still it was working in his favour. Nagito walked over, slipping through the curtain. The stage had to be set. Something hard clutched his heart and for the first time since he conceived the plan Nagito felt tears run down his face. It was pathetic and he slapped himself. Trash like him didn’t deserve to live. Death with meaning was the only thing he was good for in the end, but he wasn’t even a martyr. Martyrs were blessed people dying for their beliefs. Nagito was just a piece of trash, only good for the foundation of hope. It was a bit presumptuous of him to assume his death would even come close to inspiring hope, but Nagito had no choice.

Sitting down Nagito got to work, first taping his mouth shut and then tying up his legs. The rope bit into his ankles, even through his jeans. Already he could feel the blood cut off, making his feet numb. Nagito ignored it and moved on. Quickly he tied his left hand down and made sure to grab the end of the spear. Nagito pulled it up, holding the end of the cord tightly.

This was it. Nagito could already feel his lips drying from the tape while the tape became moist from his breath and saliva. Nagito swallowed and tasted only artificial fumes. He had to do this. Gripping the knife in his right hand Nagito closed his eyes and stabbed his right leg hard.

The metal cut easily into his flesh. It felt a cold burning sensation, a tingling at the edges of broken skin. Nagito cried out against the tape. Sweat was already pouring down his brow. He ripped the knife out and pain exploded behind his eyes. Without giving himself a chance to recover Nagito repeated the action. The pain felt the same. He could feel the stickiness of blood against the knife and his skin. He repeated the action until he lost track of how long it had been. The pain was clouding all of his senses and tears were obscuring his vision. He only had a moment of rest when he deemed his right leg wounded enough. Maybe he had stabbed some of those awful names that littered his legs.

The image of those names made bile rise in his stomach and Nagito immediately raised the knife to his left leg, plunging it in. It was easier this time, like a swimmer who was returning to the pool. Down the knife went, into skin, into flesh. Nagito’s left hand was cramping and his right hand was shaking. He had to continue. He wasn’t even close to finishing. The thought made him cry harder. If he was stopped now… he really was useless. If he was stopped his plan to become hope would crumble. It was the last thing he had left and without it he really was trash. He could feel the will to live clashing with the desire to become hope inside of him. It should have been beautiful but all it did was make Nagito sob harder.

He was crying so hard that when a voice registered in his mind Nagito felt his muscles twitch and freeze. Suddenly the knife was smacked out of his hand. His fingers couldn’t stop it and the dull clink of metal against concrete echoed. Nagito choked back a sob and tried to reach for the knife.

“KOMAEDA WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

There was shuffling around the room and Nagito could barely see the knife. If he could only bend a bit further… the knife was suddenly kicked away. Nagito tore his eyes from the knife and did his best to glare.

Hinata was over by the rafter where the spear was precariously dangling. The cord was in his hand and it took Nagito a moment to realize Hinata was pulling the extra cord closer to him, dismantling the spear’s set up. Nagito felt his heart jolt but he couldn’t stop Hinata. The spear came down, clattering to the floor. Now that his set up was useless Nagito’s left hand instantly loosened, the cord slipping from his palms.

“H-Hinata… no… I need to…” He tried to say through the tape. His voice came out muffled.

“Shut up. Seriously shut the hell up.” Hinata circled around and grabbed the knife.

Nagito stared. Maybe… this was a good thing. Maybe Hinata was going to end him. It would be perfect. Maybe Hinata realized that he could rig it like a suicide after. Nagito started to laugh behind the tape. Finally, someone took his words to heart…

“I swear… you are the worse.” Hinata was rambling, his face flushed and sweaty, “What are you even thinking?” The knife was raised.

This was it. Nagito closed his eyes. When no pain occurred after a long moment Nagito opened them. Hinata was cutting the rope to his hand before moving onto his feet. Once that was done Hinata threw the knife as far as he could. It landed with a small clank in the corner.

Nagito instantly scrambled up. The spear was still close by… Hinata firmly planted himself between his goal. Instantly Nagito shuffled back. Suddenly Nagito felt his brain piece together the situation. Of course Hinata wasn’t going to kill him. It was foolish of Nagito to think the other would. If he wanted himself dead, then Nagito had to do it himself. His legs ached in response to that thought. He didn’t have the motor skills to move around Hinata. There was a lot of room, but Hinata would be faster and probably planned on tackling him once he made a move. And if Hinata touched him that meant another mark.

Nagito wasn’t sure why, but the thought of seeing Hinata’s name on his skin without the other having his name in return made his heart twist. Something sticky filled his stomach and lungs. Nagito felt his eyes water and throat clog up. What was wrong with him? Why did it matter in the end? In the long run Nagito had to kill himself, so what did it matter if Hinata touched him? Nothing would come out of it. There was no one in the world who would want Nagito’s name on them. Not even if they were paid. And it made sense; Nagito’s bad luck would just consume them. In the end everyone would leave him, so why not do something useful with his pitiful existence?

“I’m taking the tape off.” Hinata warned, moving closer, “I hope for your sake you don’t make me regret this…”

No. If Hinata tried to do that he’d touch him and then… Nagito tried to move, but his legs screamed in pain as blood continued to leak from his wounds. The only thing he could do was push himself backwards. His arms wobbled and Nagito couldn’t move fast enough.

“Komaeda!” Hinata lunged forward, “Don’t you run away from me.”

Nagito felt his heart stop as Hinata couldn’t recover from his hasty lunge. The brown haired boy toppled over, landing squarely on Nagito’s chest. It felt like a cliché as time stood still. Nagito’s brain suddenly felt clearer. He could feel the weight from Hinata pressing down onto him. His legs burned so badly and pain etched his mind that the familiar burning on his arm was merely an after thought. Hinata was touching him and he had gained another mark. The previous thought, about having the other’s name on his skin but not the other way around returned, ugly and foul. How could Nagito let this happen? First he screwed up his own orchestrated death and now he allowed Hinata to touch him. His heart was burning, but was overshadowed by the feel of skin being ripped away from the tape. It stung and probably hurt more than necessary.

“Ouch.” Nagito felt the automatic response slip from his lips.

Hinata said nothing and blearily Nagito looked up, directly at Hinata. The other’s attention was focused away, staring at the tape in his hand. If he had the energy Nagito would have waved a hand in Hinata’s face.

“Hinata-kun?” Nagito settled on talking, though his voice sounded horrible.

 “Komaeda… I…” Hinata blinked and looked over at him, eyes wide. “I… got so many questions…”

 “I don’t want to hear it.” Nagito felt himself childishly replying. Who cared what Hinata would say? The other had ruined his one chance at redeeming himself, of making his existence worth something. There was no way Nagito would be able to set another trap now.

Too late. The other twisted his arm so Nagito could see the inside of his wrist. It took him a moment to comprehend what he was seeing as his brain slowly processed the sight. Something warm bubbled up in his stomach, mixing with dread. There… was no way… A small part of Nagito hoped it was true and that small hope clouded over his thoughts. Was this the good luck he got for the bad luck of Hinata stopping him? Or was his plan the good luck and Hinata’s interference the bad luck?

“Komaeda… your name…” Hinata’s words shakily fell from his lips as he pressed his arm closer.

There, sitting neatly on Hinata’s wrist was kanji spelling out his name. Nagito’s heart soared and without thinking he began to cry. Desperately Nagito tried to image all the bad luck Hinata would experience because of his name on his wrist. Instead Nagito felt an uncontrollable maelstrom swirl in his heart. Happiness and horror mixed inside of him in a viscous liquid.

“K-Komaeda?” Hinata stammered, “Does this mean…?”

“H-Hinata-kun…” Nagito couldn’t think any more. He fell to the ground, head woozy.

The other got the message and immediately took off his tie, wrapping it around Nagito’s less wounded left leg. Turning Hinata rested his hands on Nagito’s jacket.

“We have to stop the bleeding.” Hinata’s voice was steady, “I’m sorry but I need to use your jacket."

Did Hinata have to say that? Nagito felt his brain sluggishly try to turn on, to move his mouth, to tell the other to stop… the sound of fabric ripping filled the room along with Hinata’s startled gasp. Nagito closed his eyes and couldn’t open them.

“K-Komaeda… this is…”

“Blood.” Nagito slurred.

“Oh right.” Hinata recovered quickly. Nagito felt the boy start to work. “This is the best I can do. Let’s get you somewhere so we can properly dress these wounds. Think you can move?”

Move? Nagito could barely think. He shook his head and sunk into the sweet embrace of sleep.

~

He woke up in his cottage. Nagito could tell by the smell. The ocean smell filtered in and his sheets smelt of cotton. Groaning Nagito tried to sit up, but was immediately held down by a hand.

“You’re not getting up.” That was Hinata.

Nagito forced his eyes open. Hinata was sitting on the edge of the bed. The room was lit, but the lack of light from the window told Nagito the time.

“How?”

“Don’t talk.” Hinata gently ordered, “I tried to carry you out, but the others found me. Owari ended up helping.”

Another mark. Great.

“We bandaged your legs as best as we could. Sonia found some medical books so I think everything should be fine. You cannot move or you’ll ruin our hard work.”

 Nagito turned his head and stared at the wall. It was a bit embarrassing to let Hinata into his cottage. He had been gone for such a long time. The place probably had smelt stale and it wasn’t entirely clean. Nagito supposed it would have to do for the moment; he had other things to worry about.

“You stopped me.” Nagito tried to strongly say. His voice was weak.

“Yes. Of course I did.” Hinata frowned, “Whatever you were thinking, killing yourself is not the answer.”

“How?” Nagito ignored Hinata.

“Your words this morning.” Hinata replied. “I thought they felt a bit off.”

“No… how.” _‘How did you know where to look?’_

“Oh… uh…” Hinata seemed to understand, “I just had a feeling?”

A feeling? A feeling was what undid all of his planning? Nagito wanted to laugh, but his chest protested silently at the idea.

“Look, we can talk later once you’ve recovered. Go to sleep. I’ll turn off the lights.”

That was easy to follow. Nagito shut his eyes, but immediately fluttered them open when he heard the sound of someone moving around the room. Hinata was returning to the bed, sitting on the floor.

“Hinata-kun?”

“I’m staying.”

Nagito wanted to ask if it was because they were worried he would try to off himself again, or if it was to monitor his wounds. Instead the words died from his lips. Did the reason matter in the end?

“Sleep?” Nagito tried to gesture to Hinata.

“Me?” Hinata shifted against the floor, “I’m fine here.”

It was probably a bad idea, but Nagito was too worn out to care. Shuffling over as carefully as he could Nagito made room. His movement alerted Hinata, who stood up, eyes wide.

 “Komaeda?”

“Just… sleep.”

Nagito closed his eyes and drifted, letting his offer stand. As he fell asleep he felt the covers shift and something warm press close to him. His mouth twitched into a smile.

~

Nagito woke to the smell something warm like nutmeg and cinnamon, though it was so evenly blended it smelt almost generic, like those homes fall commercials had to advertise kitchens. Shifting Nagito felt his legs protest a bit, not it didn’t hurt too much.

“How are you feeling?” Hinata’s voice was soft.

The other’s furrowed expression came to view as Nagito opened his eyes. He blinked slowly and let the sleep drain from his mind. Everything was sore, but his head didn’t feel like it was spinning. Nagito was going to take the small victories.

“Could use some water.”

“Here.” Hinata immediately reached over and handed a glass with a straw.

Nagito drained the contents. It helped, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Came the automatic response, “We’re going to have a talk now.”

“A talk?” Nagito resisted the urge to touch his legs, “I think it’s obvious what I was trying to do.”

“No. I don’t think it was.” Hinata replied, “Everyone did some investigating and while it looks like you were planning a suicide there is no motive.”

“Becoming a stepping stone for hope isn’t motive?” Nagito inquired.

“By committing suicide?” Hinata raised an eyebrow, “I don’t think so. That’s too straight forward.”

“Think what you want.” Nagito airily replied, “Though I suppose now my plan is already ruined. Don’t worry.”

Even if he could slip away, the poison probably was leaking out of the plastic. He hadn’t planned for a long term storage and even if the plastic held, the poison needed to be cold. It was beyond saving now.

“Moving on…” Hinata’s tone wavered, “We… need to discuss your arm.”

Of course. Nagito thickly swallowed, “Do you want me to explain or shall I let you guess?”

“I got nothing.” Hinata admitted, “I was pondering it all yesterday.”

“You didn’t ask the others to help you?”

“I…” Hinata suddenly blushed, “I used a bit of the curtain from the warehouse to cover your arm.”

Nagito’s eyes widened. He didn’t expect Hinata to… cover for him. “That’s…”

“I figured this should be sorted between the two of us.” Hinata firmly stated, “I saved your life and even if you didn’t want me to, I want an explanation.”

“Wanting doesn’t mean you deserve one.” Nagito bit back.

Hinata waved his arm, Nagito’s name sitting starkly on his wrist, “I said, I want an explanation.”

The other sat firmly. Nagito gingerly rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, as if telling Hinata would be easier if he didn’t see him. The ceiling was unremarkable, but preferable.

“It’s always been like this.” Nagito admitted, his heart heavy, blood heavy as it pumped through the organ, “Ever since I was born. I touch someone and their name appears on me. It fades like all normal soulmate marks though.”

Although he couldn’t see Hinata’s face, Nagito heard the sharp intake, jagged and broken. The wheels in Hinata’s head were audibly clicking and Nagito knew the other was piecing everything together.

“That’s why with Hanamura… and Tsumiki…” Hinata gagged a bit, “And Nidai…”

Nagito shrugged and slowly lifted his arm so it was in view, “I was asleep for Nidai’s… though I did wake up in pain.” He twisted his arm a bit. Now that his vision wasn’t fuzzy Nagito inspected his arm. “So... where is your name?”

Hinata audibly swallowed, “Uh it’s not on your arm.”

Not on his arm? Nagito forced himself up and turned his head to look over at Hinata. The other was blushing a bit. “It isn’t?”

“No… it’s on your collarbone.” Hinata whispered, like if he said it loud enough the mark would vanish.

His collarbone? Nagito raised an eyebrow. That was a first. He tried to bend his head down to look but could only see a hint of black on his left side.

“Here.” Hinata pulled out a small mirror, “It’s from Sonia. Sorry I couldn’t hide my name. She grabbed it from the market, said you probably would want to see.”

It wasn’t ideal that everyone knew, but Nagito would take everyone seeing Hinata’s name to everyone seeing all the other names littered on his skin. He accepted the mirror and angled it correctly. There, sitting neatly on his collar bone was Hinata’s name. Unwillingly Nagito felt warm and tingly. Seeing Hinata’s name on his skin was too much. He shuddered and nearly dropped the mirror.

“Hey, are you okay?” Hinata moved closer, invading Nagito’s space from the side.

He couldn’t answer. Words escaped his grasp and Nagito felt the warmth spread to his toes. Hinata took it as a negative sign and suddenly his hand was on Nagito’s forehead, the back of it brushing against his bangs. The angle allowed Nagito to see the inside of his wrist where the mark was. His name was etched into Hinata’s skin, looking almost translucent in the light. There was something about soulmate marks that almost glowed, but if Nagito tilted his head he could imagine it as a tattoo. Something Hinata willingly got rather than fate handing it to him. Nagito felt like melting jelly at the thought. It was so dangerous, like pufferfish, but too alluring to pass. Indulgence was one of humanity’s greatest weaknesses but Nagito consoled himself that it would be only once and moved.

Once, when Nagito was young, the tail end of summer rained so much that the river started to overflow, threatening to cover the road that ran too low and close. He remembered looking down from his walks home, watching the water creep ever so closer to the asphalt. The day before the road flooded Nagito watched the water crest up and down, like it was testing to see if crossing the boundary was a good idea. The next day the water had spilt over with reckless abandon as though the previous thought never occurred.

That’s how kissing Hinata felt. Once his lips pressed against Hinata, Nagito couldn’t stop. He encased Hinata in his arms and angled his head so they could kiss properly. Electric waves filled his stomach as the sounds in the air were borderline obscene. And it wasn’t as though Hinata was just taking it. Every press of his lips and flicker of his tongue lit a fire in Nagito. He slipped his tongue inside and tasted pure sunshine before breaking for air. It was probably a good idea to stop.

“K-Komaeda…” Hinata’s lips were swollen and it was too much. His tongue flickered out and licked his lips, “Y-your legs…”

Self control snapped and Nagito kissed Hinata again. Oh god why hadn’t they done this before? It felt so good, too good. Hinata moaned into Nagito and gripped the fabric of his jacket. The two pulled away after a while, a string of saliva breaking between their lips.

“I…” Hinata pressed his hand to his lips.

Nagito pulled away, feeling a flush return to his face. His skin tingled, “Hinata-kun…”

“Right.”

Hinata said almost to himself before looking straight at Nagito. The other hadn’t run away, in fact he had participated. That meant he enjoyed it, right? Nagito wasn’t sure. Maybe he just went along. Maybe he didn’t know how to voice rejection. Or maybe Hinata wanted it just as much as Nagito did?

“That’s… the next thing I wanted to ask.” Hinata continued, unaware of Nagito’s thoughts, “What are we?” Hinata let out a bit of a strangled laugh, “I mean I was sure we were sort of friends, but then the last trial and… now this.”

Oh. How silly of Nagito. Hinata didn’t want this stroke of bad luck forced upon him. It was fine. Not all soulmates got together. They could continue on, pretending it didn’t happen. Nagito could hide his collarbones and Hinata could cover his name. It wasn’t a big deal…

Except Nagito wanted this. The realization felt so natural that Nagito didn’t have time to feel shocked at the revelation. He wanted this so badly. He had convinced himself over the years that his name would never appear on another’s skin. His chest felt like something heavy was weighing it down, dragging his heart into an inky abyss. It burned, it ached. Nagito let out a long sob, and tried to stuff it down, but it was air, and it escaped his fingers, suffocating him.

“Komaeda?” Hinata placed a hand on his shoulder.

“You… you don’t have to lie to me Hinata-kun.” Nagito forced out, “Just go. We can pretend this never happened and I’ll hide the mark and…”

Suddenly two hands firmly grasped Nagito’s face. “Komaeda, allow me to rephrase my question.” Hinata took a deep breath, “What do you want? Honestly, tell me what you want out of this.”

Honestly? What could he say? Nagito’s heart ached. If he told Hinata the truth, then the other might feel more obligated to stay with him. Why would Hinata do that to himself? Tears ran down his face and his heart felt like a tennis ball in a match.

“Ok. Let me go first then.” Hinata started. “I want to be with you. I want to give this a chance… and let me be clear it isn’t because your name happens to be on me. I… I enjoyed our friendship before all of this. That might make me a bit crazy; you’ve done a lot of awful things.” Hinata took a deep breath, “But that’s what I want. It doesn’t have to be anything you don’t want it to be Komaeda.”

His words cut through his uncertainty. Nagito felt his heart ache, but for a different reason. This luck, this fortune was too good. It should have left Nagito wary, paralyzed with fear, but all he could feel was anticipation and wonder. The future suddenly looked a bit more tolerable and Nagito almost hated himself for feeling such a strong wave of positivity.

“So please, answer my question honestly. I will take your answer no matter what way it goes.”

There were probably a million other ways to tell Hinata his answer, all of them more elegant and sophisticated. Nagito should have used words and delivered a speech equally as inspiring as Hinata.

Instead Nagito pulled Hinata down and sealed his lips over the other’s, kissing him feverishly, loving the warmth that pooled deep inside of him.

**Author's Note:**

> Saionji at the crime scene: I know she ran away after waking up to find Koizumi's body, and I can't remember if she returned in game, but I made it that after the body announcement occurred she returned.
> 
> Pointing chopsticks at people: It's considered rude in Japanese culture (and probably other cultures who use chopsticks on a daily). Don't do it, especially at work places or in public. I think it's sort of okay with family (I don't know I've never done it at home) and friends.
> 
> Strawberry House: I took a bit of liberty with the boys, since in the game we only see Hinata and the girls until the investigation starts.
> 
> Snuggles: The day I have Hinata or Komaeda in a bed, while the other is in the room, and they don't snuggle is going to be never. CUDDLES ARE MY WEAKNESS HELP.
> 
> Pufferfish: As some might know, pufferfish are very toxic and can kill if not prepared properly before consumption. It's very difficult to prepare pufferfish, so it's considered a delicacy.


End file.
